Stories & Writing

Sick Pupper

We have three dogs and our oldest, Kosmo Kramer, turns 14 in two months. He has a rough couple years. Two years ago, Komso tore his ACL. He had surgery and recovered quite nicely.

Fun fact: Dogs who get ACL repair surgery have a 70% chance of tearing their other ACL. Well guess what, Kosmo did it. More on that in a minute.

Back in October, Kosmo was drinking a LOT of water and panting like crazy, but it wasn’t really hot out. Don’t get me wrong, he’s a chunky (but healthy) Pug-Beagle mix, so he probably is hot when no one else is, but the water consumption was out of control.

So we took him to the vet. Three times. They tested for diabetes, Cushings, kidney problems, a tumor, a super rare water-diabetes…and a bunch of money later, guess what? Nothing. There is nothing wrong with him. Basically, in his old age he’s going a little cuckoo and his desire to drink that much water is all in his mind.


Fast forward to early December. Kosmo is limping. Looks familiar. We take him to the vet and guess what? Yep, his ACL. This recovery was not quite the breeze it was the first time. Honestly, I wanted to scream a few times because Kosmo was a bit of a lunatic this time around, but he eventually calmed down and healed. We still have to carry him up and down the deck stairs to go potty, but at least he can use his leg.

In February, we found a lump at the base of his tail. It came from nowhere. The vet said it is “concerning” and we should have it removed. Well, that costs a lot of money and the chance was high they wouldn’t get it all and would have to amputate his tail, which would triple the cost.

Don’t get me wrong, I love Kosmo SO FREAKING MUCH. He is priceless to me; however, in the last 6 months we’ve probably spent two thousand dollars on him. And he is almost 14. It just feels like…a lot.

I also believe that if the lump is cancerous, there is a super high chance that cancer is somewhere else in his system, you know? And then what?


Anyway, that was all just the lead up to last night (sorry. That was a lot).

I was woken up at 3:23 am when Kosmo stirred. I assumed he would get up for a drink, or maybe he needed to go potty. So I sat up to check on him. He was sitting there awkwardly, and then he started to shake (like severe shivers). Next thing I know he slowly lays down and begins to convulse.

Teeth chattering, spit flying, legs kicking out uncontrollably. It was scary.

When it was over, he wanted to get up, but couldn’t. So I lifted him up to take him into the bathroom to get some water. As soon as we hit the tile floor he released his bowels and then he couldn’t stand up.

I rushed him outside and gingerly sat him on the grass. His eyes were wide and glassy. He started trotting around the yard in big, looping circles. He peed and eventually returned to me. We went inside and basically repeated the outside behavior (minus the peeing, thankfully). He just trotted around the house, looking into each room. He never wagged his tail, he never came to see me. For about 20 minutes he trotted around, panting, and stopping to drink water every couple minutes.

Finally, he started to calm down and indicated that he wanted to go to bed. I put him up there, and after or a minute or two he laid down.

But that only lasted about five minutes. Then we were back up, back outside, back to trotting around the yard and then the house.

He was pitiful.

Finally, finally he went to his own little bed in our room. I laid with him for about 15 minutes to keep him calm–he kept sitting up suddenly like he wasn’t sure what was happening–until he fell asleep.

It was a sad and exhausting night. Today he is sleepy as all get out. He’s only gotten out of bed once to go potty.

I’m worried we’re going to lose our precious old man soon.

5 thoughts on “Sick Pupper

  1. From another dog lover who has loved, had illness, lost, loved again, and am now living on borrowed time, I feel your pain. I hope it helped to write about it. Now it seems every thing s magnified and this would be difficult in the best of times

    Liked by 1 person

  2. This is so sad. Our dogs give us so much and their lives, like our own, get so dang difficult. Good luck with your Kosmo. I’m not far behind with my two buddies I fear. And yet, we never know, sometimes they just rally.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. This broke my heart. Last night was probably terrifying for you. Hold him tight and let him know you love him with all your heart. I hope and pray that tonight isn’t a repeat of last night. Sending positive thoughts and love your way.

    Liked by 1 person

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